Wednesday, February 10, 2016

Flash Episode, Welcome to Earth 2 - full of Easter Eggs and Horrible Decisions!

I’ve seen a lot of people excited about last night’s Flash episode and all it’s Easter Eggs, however I found it incredibly annoying with so many errors that I had to do my own break down.

Spoilers  and annoyed attitude ahead...

 The show starts with Harry recording a journal entry or maybe just talking out loud, talking about how he’s been distracted, but now he’s coming and not alone.

Wasn’t that his goal from the start? I’m not sure how many parents have a child kidnapped and then go on vacation to another dimension. But you know, that’s been going on a couple weeks now.

 Meanwhile The Flash closes all of the breaches, except for the one in S.T.A.R. Labs.

Hey, maybe leave like three open, you know so you have multiple escape routes? I mean you’ve been throwing bombs into a portal with no idea of what is happening on the other side, I’m sure its totally safe. But yeah, let’s only leave one open because really, what could go wrong.

Barry has a goodbye dinner with Joe and Iris before heading to Earth-2 and he admits that he never told his father what he was doing, he worried he would talk him out of it.

Not so sure Barry, your Dad didn’t even want to stay in the same town as you, he’s got fishing to do. Why he’d be concerned about this but none of the other deadly situations you ‘ve been in I’m not sure.

We then head back to S.T.A.R. Labs, where Jay lectures Barry and Cisco that everything they see will be weird and wrong. He says “Up will be down”. And that they should not get personally involved.

This is where things really start to go downhill. Instead of being cryptic, how about giving details, this isn’t time travel where they might screw up the present, going in uninformed is the dumbest thing, ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU HAVE TWO PEOPLE FROM THAT UNIVERSE THERE WITH YOU AND ON YOUR SIDE! Or are they? Also, up was not down, gravity worked the same. Jay’s a liar.

Classic moment of “if we’re not back in 48 hours that means bad guy won so just give up on us” speech happens.

How about, if we’re not back in 48 hours, call Ollie!

They all say good byes and another talk about not getting distracted. Hint Hint

They enter the breach which is apparently not a quick portal to the other side, but a lobby to all sorts of other earths.

Really glad we were throwing bombs in there now.  

Then, a piece of the speed cannon breaks off, and Jay saves Caitlin from being crushed by it. How convenient. Jay realizes that with the other breaches closed, this one is less stable. The others might be trapped on Earth-2.

Stop. Stop right there. HOW DOES HE KNOW THIS?! I’ll tell you how, because he’s actually connected to Zoom, we saw that he found his doppelganger on our Earth, but his name is Hunter Zolomon, which just so happens to be the name of Zoom in comics, this can no longer be a coincidence. So not only can Barry get caught in time loops, but so can the plot of the series.

We get into some details of Earth 2 that are fun, like who is the mayor, everything has an Instagram filter of Sepia on it and tech is new, but clothes are still tweed. Barry sees himself on the news.

Problem 1 with this – That means Wells new of Barry of his Earth, he had to see him on the new before.

Barry takes off and returns right away with his double. The Earth-2 Barry is freaked out by being abducted by his own metahuman double, and in awe of meeting Harry.

Problem 2 – Earth 2 Barry is more excited to meet Wells than he is that there is a doppelganger of himself. I would love to meet Bruce Willis, but, if my double from another universe brought me to him, I might hold off on my Die Hard questions until after I figure out why there are two of me.

At CCPD, Barry is shocked to see Singh is not a police officer, but a criminal being arrested.

Odd switch, but okay, is he still gay at least?

Floyd Lawton is a cop, and apparently the worst shot on the force. The nickname Deadshot is used sarcastically.

So did he never join suicide squad? Is there no Amanda Waller?
Detective West is Iris, not Joe.

Sure why not. But also: WHY DIDN’T JAY TELL BARRY OR ANY OF THEM ABOUT THIS!!! Even when he first got there say “Wow on my world you’re the cop and he’s a lounge singer.” And oh yeah Kaitlin you’re killer Frost, Ronnie is alive and deathstorm, Cisco you’re the evil leader and you have a LOT more powers and also all bad guys, and we should all probably avoid them.Nope, instead we get Up is Down. Which it’s not.  

Killer Frost knows of ‘Breachers’ meaning others have crossed over before. (Like Hunter Zolomon maybe?)

Also phones only have 5 buttons, you’re only allowed to call people you know. Keep in mind Harry’s daughter still in the hands of a killer and no matter how many speeches of  don’t get distracted, they are all distracted. Cisco is trying to figure out who he is on Earth 2, well why didn’t Harry or Jay tell you? Who knows, reasons.

We get to see Joe sing, it was only a matter of time, he’s a broadway singer, we already got Glee Barry to sing in season one.

There’s a bunch of stuff with Joe not liking Barry, that Barry is more concerned about than Harry’s daughter.
Back home Jay tells Caitlin he lost his speed due to taking drugs. Good job Jay. Liar

Then we get Geomancer, weird name Cisco would have come up with something better, probably Quake, but DC can’t use that. 

Jay can’t fight him with velocity 6, but don’t worry, what you took years to develop Caitlin can create Velocity 7 and 8 in an hour. 

But side effects are he loses connection to the speed force, oh, so you LIED about Zoom stealing it. Jerk. And supposedly it’s killing, him, sorry, I’m totally not believing anything he says any longer.

Back to Earth 2 and forgetting about the mission at hand, Killerfrost and Deathstorm enter. They search for the breacher, and right as they become suspicious of Barry, Iris draws her gun. 

Which is apparently enough for everyone to leave. 

Then Joe gets hit by Deathstorm which will later lead to his death, this is all cause essentially because Barry stopped thinking about the mission.

Barry gets Killer Frost and Deathstorm outside, AND SETS THEM DOWN GENTLY. If he can do that, why didn’t he run them into a wall and knock them out?! They just shot Joe! You’re dad!

Deathstorm flies after Barry, shooting fire at him, and apparently he can keep pace with Barry at 1500mph. Barry then runs  to a statue of Jay as the Flash and pulls off the helmet to deflect Ronnie's blast. 

… they make stautes on Earth 2 with removable parts. The sculpted Jay, and then they glued on his hat.  Sure. Makes sense.

Barry goes and complains to Harry, not about not warning him about ANY of this, but about Joe is hurt. 

Well Barry, that’s your fault not Harry’s, if you would have done what he told you to do, Joe would be fine.

More Geomancer stuff back home and a quick shot of Wally in case you forgot he was still around, because he has nothing to do with this episode. Jay comes to fight, but stumbles after 6 feet,

Nice job Caitlin

Velocity 7 doesn't work, or Jay is faking it. Joe shoots Geomancer to stop him from hurting Jay, but doesn’t shoot him in the head, he shoots him in the body armor. 

Nice job Joe.

Art by Chris Conti of Under The Hood Artits
Joe dies from wounds from Deathstorm. Good job Barry, you killed your dad. We get evil Cisco, but he offers to train good Cisco. Stein is trapped in Ronnie and doesn’t even here him anymore. Flash runs into save them, but rather than take them all out at super speed, he just hip checks one of them and then stops. Barry has to learn to fight better. Lawton from less than 10ft away can’t hit evil Cisco, nor does he accidently shoot good Cisco. Were there even bulletts in the gun? 

Nice job Lawton.

Zoom arrives kills Ronnie, who must have the weirdest contract in TV, Barry wakes in a glass cell. There are two other prisoners there, someone in a metal helmet and Jesse. Person in the metal helmet is Africa American, probably Wally.

He tries to reassure Jesse he’ll get her out, I guess he can’t avoid it now that she’s right there.
In walks Zoom and tells Barry he isn’t going anywhere.

End episode.

Easter eggs galore to cover up that there are just soooo many flaws, I was just annoyed the whole time. I get the suspension of disbelief to have the comic book science work, but just the utter stupidity of the characters choices throughout this episode, it felt like the writers of Pretty Little Liars took over.

Hopefully next week some answers will come out and we can see what is going to happen next.